So this weekend we were talking about kids and a good friend asked, "What are you scared of?" It was a great question and has got me thinking. What am I scared of? Well where do I begin.......
1. I am scared of having a baby/toddler/child like someone I grew up with. I am going to protect the innocence and not use names..... but lets just say that it wasn't my brother ( I don't have one of those). I am sure I was no peach but I have the pleasure of not remembering (minus all those difficult teenage years). I do remember the day that my sister was brought home. Oh what a happy time filled with screaming at the top of her lungs day in and day out. I would like to think it got better when she became a toddler but it continued and temper tantrums were thrown in. It didn't matter if it was in the privacy of our own home or public, she would throw herself on the ground and carry on and on and on. There wasn't really a predisposing factor that set her off, they could occur at any time and if my memory serves me correctly, happened multiple times a day. In my sisters defense she had colic and was a very sick child. Plus I have been told that she was a payback child from the way my mom was when she was little. Either way it was very taxing on all parties involved. My mom always said that if she was the first child she would have been the last. So that runs in my blood. Not to mention that Andrew has one of these in his life. His sister was the same way. So now lets say that this "behavior" is a gene and we break out the punnett square like so
And lets say Andrew carries the recessive gene and I have the recessive gene, according to Punnett's theory 1 out of 4 of our future children would/could possibly be a
2. Holy moly do you know how much children cost? I was just informed that the average day care costs 1000 dollars a month regardless if the child is there or not. Oh my goodness.....not to mention all of the other things that go along with babies. Diapers, food, cribs, toys, private schools, camps, college, etc.
3. What goes up most come down or in this case must come out. Now there are two ways a baby can come out and I have had the privilege of seeing both and neither one of them look very pleasurable. Enough said.
4. Being pregnant scares me (and Andrew). Poor guy. Morning sickness, fatigue, weight gain, bleeding gums, the possibility of TWINS, etc.
5. You know that commitment thing that I was talking about here? Yeah........well having a child is the epitome of that.
6. What about if the unthinkable happens and we were blessed with a baby that was sick? Would we be able to handle the challenge?
7. What about if I am not a good mom. Sometimes I am not a very patient person. What about if my child doesn't like me? What about if I am unable to provide for them?
8. It stinks that we do not have more family close to us. Who are we going to leave our kids with? Granted my dad and Lori are here but they live 40 minutes away. A little side note......do you know how often kids get sick? Our good friends are battling this weekly. Sick kids= missed days at work= loss of money. Plus how do you decide whose job is more important? Andrew can't take time off of work during season and my future job probably wouldn't appreciate me taking time off either. So that my friends is quite the predicament.
9. And then there is the love/hate Florida thing. How are they going to play in the grass with all of the fire ants that run ramped? What about the lack of young people their age and our age? My girlfriend does a mommy group but still it just seems like there are so many younger families north. My sister in law lives in a neighborhood where they have block parties and all of the kids run around. Here you have a young family surrounded by a bunch of older people. I am sure it is part of the "elite" club and once you have kids you find people to hang out with that also have kids. Unfortunately you have to have a kid before this secretive world opens up so it could be right in front of me and I wouldn't know. Bottom line I worry about raising kids in Florida.
10. Balance. What about if we aren't able to balance kids, family, work, house? Sometimes we have a hard time finding balance in all of the things that we have deemed important thus far in our life let alone adding a little person. How do we not forget who we are? Will there still be time for dates, spin class, happy hour, sleeping in, etc? This is stuff that we enjoy doing (well I don't think Andrew likes spin class but I make him go) what about if we can't do it anymore. I don't ever remember my parents going out together and then this relates back to #8. Who would watch our little one(s) while we make time for us?
Don't get me wrong I can't wait for the day that we are ready to embark on the next step in our life and today I discovered what single handily helps speed up the process.............. a trip to Babies R Us!
On a completely not cautious side-
I can't wait to feel a baby grow, kick, flutter inside of me. I am so excited for the day that we can say we are "parents". I am excited to see who are little creation will look like. Excited to see Andrew as a dad. Excited to see my parents as grandparents. But until we can push caution aside we will continue to enjoy just the two of us and admire all of our "little friends"
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| Our nephew |
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| Our niece |
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| Our buddy Hazel |
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| Our niece and nephew |
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| Lyla |
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