Closing chapters

I love the ole saying "When one door closes another one opens." I will be the first one to say that it is a lot easier to close a door when it is being closed for you.  I have never really quit anything before.  I have always sort of transitioned into the next big thing.  I worked at the hair salon up north until I graduated college and moved to Florida.  My few jobs down here the doors were either "closed" (HomeBanc) or I moved on.  I used to love my job.  Over the past couple of months I didn't have the same gusto about it and the stress level was at an all time high.   I interviewed with a great company and after many of weeks I finally got offered the job.  The senior PA has been there 21 years, the next 20 years, the next 15 years and the next 6 months.  I would have to say that based on those facts it is a pretty darn good company/career.  I told my doctor on Friday and it didn't go very well.  He is currently experiencing the stages of "grief."  He spent a day in denial, went through the guilt and is currently stuck in the anger phase. 

Being the great decision maker that I am (eye roll) I of course am having a serious case of, "maybe I shouldn't have quit, what about if the grass isn't greener, what about if I am making a HUGE mistake?" remorse.   Insert- laying awake for hours upon hours panicked.  I know that I need to move on.  I haven't been happy in awhile.  The duties of the job are not split fairly and I feel that I am required to pick up the slack.  But with that being said it was a pretty good gig.  I have a doctor that respects PA's which is huge.  If I didn't agree, or understand something he would take the time to listen/explain.  I have seen other PA's leave a bad gig for a worse gig and I hope that doesn't happen to me.  I wanted to go the distance with my doctor, but I just don't think I can pass this opportunity up.  He is nearing retirement and there are SO many variables.

My new job is with 21st Century Radiation 0nc0l0gy..............I hope my heart strings can handle it.  I know it might sound strange but I am drawn to it.  Maybe it is the thought of working in a stable, functional work environment that has me drawn.  Maybe it is that I will actually be able to use vacation days, have the holidays and weekends off.  Maybe it is the fact that all the doctors come highly respected, work together and every single person told me they love their job.  My favorite parts was they said they were in it for the patients.......not the money. (I am sure the money helps).  Plus I keep going back to a lot has to be said for a company where they have such longevity in theirs careers.  Who knows......... maybe it is part of my bigger plan.   Maybe I am naive......maybe the grass isn't greener, but what if it is? 

Did I also mention that Andrews company closed this week?  It has been a very stressful/mopey/depressing week at our house.  We have tried to be there for each other but I think we finally are just internalizing our own struggles.  I can imagine it would be hard to hear about the excitement of my job when he just lost his.  He isn't a very good door closer but with it already being closed he is looking at all of his options.  The exciting thing is he has options.