Papa Gus

"There are decades when nothing happens, and there are weeks when decades happen." --Lenin 

This saying couldn't be more true right now. We are definitely in the midst of decades happening in a mere couple of weeks. We found out about two months ago that Andrew's Papa was diagnosed w/ small cell bladder cancer (within days of my moms diagnosis). Prior to his official diagnosis he already had his mind up that he wasn't going to make it nor was he going to undergo treatment. He ended up doing a couple of weeks of radiation but was absolutely miserable. It was sad to see him decline and withdrawal from the things that were so important to him. Papa was no doubt larger than life.  What I have noticed, is that people that are larger than life have a really hard time being sick and weak.   

Papa loved his town. Andrews family is 4th generation Wellsvillians.  In the midst of this small town was one of his true loves, his families beloved diner, the Texas Hot.  Papa's father came from a little village in Greece and ended up settling in the small town and opened the diner in 1921.  Over the years, they have preserved the small town feel of the diner. Papa Gus inherited the restaurant from his father and then passed it down to his son Chris.  He adored the Texas Hot, the customers and the workers, some of them third generation servers. Every single morning, he would drive the two blocks to the diner and sit in the same booth, with his same old friends and chat about politics, life, stock market, etc.  He was the face of the the Hot.  No one sat in his booth the day after his passing they made a little shrine for him. 

I remember when I first met Andrew he told he how much his grandparents meant to him. He said that he would not be ok when they passed.  He loved his Papa. He was his mentor, looked to him for guidance, was his idol and at the end of the day his friend. He talked to him almost daily.  He had been going up there more frequently over the last couple of years, and went twice over the last couple of months. He was actually up there the week before he passed. He said he made peace with the situation and knew that wanting Papa to stay in this world was selfish.  He said he didn't get a chance to say physically say goodbye but they both knew that would be the last time they would see each other in this world. 

There was no doubt that Papa was the "boss". Even till his last dying breath he remained in "charge."  He told his daughter that he had enough, to get his wife Rheba and it was time. She was brought to the hospital just in time for her to hold his hand and say goodbye.  The weeks before his passing he told Andrews mom Diana what he wanted for his funeral, what he wanted in his obituary, etc. 

Andrew and I were on the East Coast when we got the call that Papa passed. I had a conference and Andrew drove me and dropped me off while we waited for all of the details of the funeral. On his way back to the hotel he saw a beautiful rainbow. At the same time one of his friends posted online a rainbow in Wellsville. Papa sure lit up the sky as he was welcomed into heaven.


Papa wanted a Greek Orthodox funeral and that is exactly what we had.  His 5 kids, 16 of 17 grandchildren and the majority of his great grand children came home for the funeral. I have to admit through the sadness and tears there was equally as much happiness and laughter. Papa was a great man and lived a great life.  He was successful in every aspect of life and had his health, mind and sense of humor till the end. When someone makes it to 87 years of age there is a lot of celebrating mixed in with the crying.  However, the crying that was encountered was sadness that could be felt to your core. Because at the end of the day, Andrew lost his person in life.  When your person loses their person your heart breaks for them. 

Papas funeral was held at 11am on a Tuesday.  The children from the Catholic church stood in silence on the steps as the town filed in.  500 people sat through the hour long service that was mostly in Greek which spoke largely for what type of man Gus was.  The Greek traditions were mesmerizing, the chanting, the songs all of it was beautiful. 

After the service there was a private family burial also mostly in Greek. Rheba wanted to be buried with her family so Papa purchased a plot of land next to them and every year he planted flowers, trees and tended to the burial site. It was super hot and I looked o over and everyone was standing under the shade. The shade from the tree that he planted many years ago. Papa was still providing for his family even after his passing.

After the burial, there was a private luncheon.  His friends and family members had the chance to say some things about him. Papa Gus was one of the most generous, kind, loving person that I ever met. He provided a great life for his children and his grandchildren.  His generosity came with zero strings and was done without recognition.  Papa was wealthy, belonged to the swankiest Naples country clubs, had many properties, planes etc. But with all that he was the most humble, down to earth person that I have ever met. You would never know that he had money.  He drove an old car and he ultimately did not let his fortune change or define him. And that is exactly the type of person I want to be. Have  millions of dollars in the bank, be generous, humble and give without expecting anything in return. It didn't matter if you were the CEO or the janitor. He treated you the exact same.  

I think it says a lot about the person that you are to have so many people in your passing stop by, drop off food, share a memory, send cards, flowers etc.  I loved hearing the stories, the things that this man did for his town, his family, his friends and for strangers.  He touched so many peoples lives. Papas funeral, memorial, tribute restored my faith in humanity. I was in awe of the town and friends that stopped by just to say hi or drop off food. The outpouring of love was magical.  It was a nice reminder to show support for friends that are going through similar situations. Something so simple as a shared memory, call, card, paper plates, water, did not go unnoticed and made things a little easier in a very difficult time. The love and kindness that I witnessed after his passing was something only one could dream about. At the end of the day don't we all want to leave this world thinking that we mattered and made a difference? Papa Gus definitely did.  How lucky am I to have been a small part of his last chapter? Below are just a couple of the messages posted online. 


It's funny how Andrew keeps mentioning how much Papa inspired him and how he hope he can be half the man he was.  In my book, he is already well on his way. 

Papa's sister, Katherine 89 and brother, John 91

Andrews sisters + spouses and parents